Ban-anas!

I don't like bananas, honestly. It's weird, because I'm usually a fruit kind of person. (Except, ironically, for tomatoes. ICK!)

So, readers, you know what I decided yesterday? I don't like bananas. Nobody needs to be exposed to this heinous fruit. Giving our children bananas inhibits their morality. First they read about bananas, and then they think "hey, it's okay to eat bananas all day! This guy in the book I read ate a banana, so bananas are AWESOME!"

We simply cannot have this happen. We need, in order to ensure the well-being of our children. to take action. There's a movie out there, currently sitting on the shelves of nearly every public library in America, called Remember The Titans. This movie, under the guise of a light-hearted family film, tries to subliminally smuggle bananas into the back door. In fact, the movie does not only contain suggestions of bananas, but shows the main role model of the film consuming, and then sharing, a banana! The floodgates have been opened, ladies and gentlemen, for otherwise good people to be exposed to this horrible fruit. The movie is practically a banana free-for all! The character of Ronnie Bass breaks into a banana plant and raids it, feeling no guilt or remorse. In fact, the villian of the movie eats three whole bunches of bananas, and tells the hero that bananas are the way to eternal life, that life is all about obtaining and cultivating these monstrosities.

It could be argued, my friends, that it's illogical to ban something from fiction that occurs in the real world day-to-day. However, that does not excuse writers of fiction from being morally responsible. They have no possible legitimate reason to include bananas in their fiction, espescially if it could end up in the hands of your children.

I encourage you to take action in your community. There are, no doubt, other fruits that could harm our children. They're being swept under the rug as we speak, and only you can take action, as a concerned parent, for the community.

Thanks,
Tomato